But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
This is the prime rib incident all over again
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
