Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize