Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize