Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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