I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I just had sex on a roof
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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