i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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