That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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