i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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