Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
