I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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