I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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