Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Randomize
