I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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