At least make sure they are 18
Why
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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