She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
