her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize