Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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