Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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