Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
