we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
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