Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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