Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
