I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
