Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize