i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
