He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
