is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize