pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
