Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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