remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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