i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
