did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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