Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
