why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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