Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
