Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
