i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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