i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Randomize
