So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
