no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize
