Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
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