; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
is wine microwaveable?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
