She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
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