that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
