I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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