i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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