a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize