Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i dont even know how to be here
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
