Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I'm sobbing to NWA
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize