yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
