Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize
